Teavana

So it's been a while. I hope you didn't feel deprived of your daily dose of depressing discourse. Was that enough alliteration for you? This weekend has been...epic, to say the least. I'll start you off with Friday:
     Friday is hazy, what did I waste my time doing? Oh I know, I traveled to the Overland Park/Olathe (all the same to me, they're a suburb as the big KC) mall to get some more tea. Why, you might ask, would you, an idiotic teenage college kid, travel 45 minutes out of your way to get some stupid tea? I'll tell you why, because it's damn good stuff. It's from a place called Teavana in the mall. I know I know, you scoff at the fact of anything good coming out of a mall besides clothes (and roasted almonds), but indeed there are good consumer items somewhere in this world of malls. I truly am a lover of this tea, which is a combination of apple lemon pomegranate and imperial acai blueberry teas. I really enjoy the fact that it's called imperial, because then it gives me the feeling like my trip was not one to a suburban mall, but a wild safari upon elephant-back into the Orient to gather some other-worldly spices. You may call it a trip to the mall, but I call it adventure. Hey, I even ran into this phenomenon called rush hour on the way back, so that counts for something. In safari terms, that would've been the part where the elephant stepped on a thorn and pussed out so I had to read it a Dr. Seuss book to get it back into the mental mode to carry me onward toward the Orient of tea. I digress.
     There was also a suspected shooter on campus! :O (sideways gasp face) There was noise of a disturbance in McCollum Hall, and words consisting of "Where's my gun" were overheard. Now if I'm not mistaken, that just sounds like some rough foreplay. It's no need to send the campus into a frenzied spiral of panic. It actually did the opposite for me, I wasn't fooled. Nope, I drove up as close as possible to try and get a look at the potential porn star, presumably in dorm room 343, because that number is of course an innuendo (no it isn't) {yes it is}. Anyway, that was a fun and exciting time for the University. One of my good friends at the esteemed Kansas State University even texted me within 10 minutes of myself receiving the alert, asking about the news. This of course meant that he had no life of his own if he was inquiring about my University, but I responded anyway with this gem: (There's blood everywhere.) Now that's a pretty open-ended answer, and one fitting for the situation. He didn't respond.
     On Saturday I helped out an old friend with State Journalism for high school. I would like to point out that I am in no way connected to anything journalism, I just like to help out my friends (and score brownie points with them). Only did I realize after my friend had introduced me to one of her good friends, and we had been chatting for quite some time that I had a protrusion from the side of my head the size of the Eiffel Tower. Photo-realistic Description follows:

"God Help Humanity"

Embarrassing, I know. Way to go Coop, you sure do look like a straight shooter, spot off the cover of GQ magazine! Nothing a little water and paper towels can't fix. I think the indicator for a shower reaches critical mass when you can run your fingers through your hair, and it stays in that position. Holy Crap. 

     That was fun, sitting and watching high schoolers write pathetic stories about "Ad Astra High." What kind of bullshit name for a school is that? That's like the quintessential patriotic name. I personally think they should have named it Mohammed High, just for some diversity. 

     The real good time came afterward when I had the pleasure of catching up with some high school friends, who reassured me that indeed, college life is better, and high school drama and events are 95% worthless. The other 5% included the possible "real" conversations that might have taken place during those 4 years, accompanied by those one or two amazing teachers that actually gave a shit about you and you formed deep, long-lasting relationships with. I do, in fact, have basically two mothers thanks to our education system and surprisingly high quality teachers at SV high. 

     The rest of the day was spent catching up on much needed sleep, which I've heard is quite a hot commodity come this time of year, and spending some quality time with my good friend Erika from Washburn, what a dear. There's nothing like spending time with a platonic friend by purchasing Chipotle with a buy one get one free card and then skimping on Ben and Jerry's by going to Walmart instead of the scoop shop just down the street. I am almost certain, however, that Ben and Jerry's runs in my veins, because I was told that my mother consumed a metric ton of the stuff during pregnancy. Great stories. I'll quit bothering you now.