Wednesday, March 30, 2016

Pediatrics

I am now a full 3 1/2 weeks into my Pediatrics rotation! You might be thinking this makes me a childhood expert of sort. No. I have come here to shout from the rooftops of the great metropolis of Wichita that indeed, no, I am no child expert. Here's what I've figured out so far:
  • Babies poop. A lot. 
  • The diaper industry has got to be making bank on these little turds (literally!). 

  • I can now safely identify a difference in age between a 2 month and a 12 month old.  Notice I said difference in age, but in no way could I tell you what they should be doing at those different time-frames, nor what shots they should be receiving. I'll leave that to the experts (Dr. Google), one of which I currently am not. 
  • Babies vary widely on their sleep habits. Some sleep almost through the night at 2 months, others decide to torment their creators for months on end. I fear for my own future sleep. 
  • The catch-all answer to any question my preceptor asks about what a kid has that has not failed me yet is, "It's probably viral". You hear that parents? NO antibiotics for you! Envision a Hot-Pink prescription pad with AMOXICILLIN inscribed in typical Lime-Green gel pen fashion trying to make its way out of the fiery pits of the Pediatrician's office, and my preceptor wielding an Otoscope in both hands yelling, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS". 
That, my friends, is the day in the life of a Pediatrician. 

And Remember, the most likely answer is: It's Probably Viral.