Saturday, June 26, 2010

I've told you once

So much going on, so little I have wrote.

Of late, I have been working away in the fields filled with the tender and loving thistle plant, who by now I am completely sure will be my soulmate. Alas, all good things must come to an end, and ended indeed was the life of the thistle plant on all of the pasture land that we roamed. I might even go as far to say that I'll miss it. Ok, I won't go that far, that'd be quite a venture. No, it was the great company for this past week and a half that has made it such a pleasure, and a delight of course. It taught me hard work, sweat, blood in some cases (it's not like your everyday pasture doesn't come with jungle cats y'all!), and tears (of joy, at seeing more thistle in the distance). I noticed an ad on craigslist for help with thistle nearby, and I most certainly picked that up, for I must continue my thistle streak.
On another note, cleaning has engulfed my life. Is it sad that I completely washed and waxed my dad's car merely because I was annoyed at all of the bugs on the front bumper? Yeah, a great 3-hour time waster. But in the process, I talked to my neighbor who just so happens to be somewhat famous and I was led on another adventure in history to Gordon Parks, who if you don't know, directed Shaft among many other things. It's amazing what one event will lead to. I know this doesn't make much sense at all, but it's quite a hoot in my mind! I'll quit bothering you for now, I'm going to go wash my car, because that seems to be the most interesting thing I could possibly do on a Saturday! Stay warm!

Thursday, June 17, 2010


Ain't this weather somethin' fierce. One day it was plum rainin' sideways, tearin' trees down to their roots, and the next it's hotter than a Texas summer out on the cattle ranch. I say! Some time it sho' is.
My apologies for the absence in literature. I have been taking to the hills of late, literally. I've put my skills and convictions to work in the form of cutting musk thistle, is what I do believe it is called:
"Oh hi Mr. Hand, would you kindly screw off?"

That is what the devil's work looks like, it's name is musk thistle. Gloves are a must, but even then, this thistle presents quite a "prickly" situation, if you know what I mean. It's quite a joy on the hands. 
In other news, Little Sweden is still boring! For all of you not familiar with my town, that is in no way breaking news, it's old hat in fact. However, in one foul swoop of an attempt to garner attention and attraction for the town, Midsummer's Festival is this weekend! You all should come, it'll be a gas! There's so much to do, I can't even describe it all on here. Basically, you walk around looking at all of the Swedish crap at the booths, whilst the people at the booths are hoping to the almighty that you buy something because it's the only time other than the Apocalypse that somebody would come to this town. I digress, it's quite a lovely place. The wind is nice. And prevalent. 
So on that note, it'll be a weekend filled with fun and jubilation, not unlike my night last night! Have you ever been to an authentic German dinner, hosted by an authentic German war bride (from WWII might I add) who came over to the great place known as America at the age of 22, knowing little to no English, and giving it all up in her homeland to stick it out in Kansas? No, I didn't think so, so shove off because I did. There was everything in and around and under the hills at that table: dumplings, which for those of you not in the know, are a bread-y mass of goodness, schnitzel, Rolaten*, peas and green beans, rolls, salad, and no less than four desserts! Apple cheesecake, cherry pie, plum cake, and strawberry shortcake. Talk about heaven! I up and died it was so delicious, and the only reason I'm typing this now is because I was sent back to this place to tell y'all about such a good time of vittles. It really was something spectacular. It was so good that even thinking about it has made tiny bags of thistle start to pull on my eyes. Guess it's time for a slumber. I'll update soon, as soon as I can make time in my hectic schedule.
     *(Om Nom)

Tuesday, June 8, 2010


Apologies for the low-to-no postage (not a commercial) in the past few half-fortnights, I have been detained by several factors. One being the garage. A garage is a horrible American invention that allows us to live up to our horrible standards of large amounts of crap, where the garage is the church, and the crap is the congregation. It is horrible. Add two brothers and an auction-obsessed mother into the picture, and we have our very own Armageddon.
My father was quite adamant about not throwing anything metal away, but instead getting a "fair go" at its value at the scrap metal place in Salina. Right, like you're really going to get any substantial amount of money at the scrap metal place. But riches are to be had you say? Mountains of cash can be accumulated by the conquest of metal in its rare form of scrap, you jest? I say nay to you naysayers! Twenty three dollars was all that we could suffice from an exorbitantly large load accompanied by a clingy set of box springs. This bed burden had made no less than 9 trips throughout its 30 year lifetime in my family, and was it worth moving 9 times only to have it subjected to the demons of scrap, and being dealt a $5 scrap sentence? You are not a patriot if you say it was so! Minus the gas we had to pay to fill up the truck, minus the 2 dollar drinks at McDonald's (my mom and I were thirsty y'all), we came out in the red. Quite a prosperous afternoon that was. If you can't tell already, this monster of a garage has been consuming my life, so it is indeed not a very exciting one at all.
I came upon a philosophical thought the other day whilst watching a game of sport endured by my brethren engaging in Basketball in a town 45 minutes away from home: What if people put as much emphasis towards learning as they did on sports for their kids? That, I believe, is the million dollar question. I took a look at my brothers' calendars the other day, and they're packed fuller than a college girl's luggage after returning from a semester abroad. Pretty full I'd say.
I promise I'll update quicker from now on, I know you're just dying to hear about my exploits in Little Sweden! Oh, I think my life may have hit a new high, for tomorrow I'm going to call and see if I can join the local farmer's market with "Coop's Cooking".